But I’m not dead. I just changed the look of my blog. The old one was ugly (I’d thrown it together within half an hour and without much thought), and I knew I’d be tired of it within a couple of weeks. I even wrote a post about it trying to convince myself that it was good. It’s not. Now, I think (I hope) that it is a little better. I hope all 35 of you aren’t completely confused. You are in the right place.
This picture is actually of me. And that’s a real shot of my actual safe haven – my bed. I hope the pic is not a recognizable one – if it is, and you’re like “Hey! I know you!” then I would ask you to please, please, never confront me about it. Just pretend like you never saw it or know I have this space. Because I won’t even let Boyfriend read it. And if anyone in my personal life ever saw this, I would panic and delete this whole thing. Seriously.
The other day, I was proof-reading a few old pages (proofing before I hit Publish isn’t my thing), and saw I’d typed my actual first name in a post.
My heart STOPPED. It was about 1:00 in the morning, and an literally jolted out of bed, and fumbled though my phone’s editing options trying desperately to delete that name. It still makes me sick to think that I did that by mistake.
The main reason I do not want to be discovered like that is simply because of work. I’m a professional (technically), and I can’t be talking about work and my personal life in such an open way if people know who I am. I’ve taken great care not to even explain what my job title is, the type of business I am in, or who my employer is. I need to remain anonymous.
So yeah, if you know me? Please don’t out me in the comments or give me a sly, knowing smirk. I will die just like the old Taylor Swift.
I also got a Twitter account. I have one post. It is very hilarious, in a not very hilarious kind of way. I’ll think of something better eventually, hopefully. Feel free to follow me: TWITTERRRRR
Anyway, it’s Saturday, and there’s snow outside. Shout out to my pal (it’s probably one-sided blog-friend-ship because she is very popular and I am not) Damn Girl who wrote a post about winterizing the day it snowed in my city. It’s just adding to my tendency to not go outside ever, and giving me more excuses to curl up in my bed and pretend it’s the right thing to do.
But in reality, I’ve had a pretty ok time this week, anxiety wise. Since the snow is white, fresh, and really pretty right now, it’s not depressing. It brightens the night, and hides the dead grass in my back yard. My cats are pretty into it in visually, but thankfully are no longer brave enough to try and escape out the front door when we open it. It’s like the lava game, only with snow. It’s pretty funny to watch those two dumb-dumbs become hypnotized by it. They truly believe they will melt if they come into contact with it.
Anyway, I don’t have a whole lot to talk about today. I don’t feel like it, since last night I spent a few hours redecorating my blog and panicking about outing myself. After two Ativans and some light reading, I finally fell asleep and got up around noon today.